a_littlevoice

did i mention i am obsessed with my families slides? there are hundreds and my grandma told me she finally got me a new slide projector. i know, nerdy.

my grandma. grandpa. my two aunts, and pops.

my grandma and grandpa

my grandpa, pops, and aunt janet.

my grandma as a babe.

myself as a babe.

man, i have so many more better pictures back home. i wish i could share some. i think when i am at my grandma's birthday party i am going to take some great pictures and make an album for her. if you didn't know...the one thing my grandma treasures more then anything is her pictures. when you walk in her house.....there are pictures EVERYWHERE. i love it.

i love my grandma more then you know.
chattin all night on a saturday night, lol.
she got my valentines card and immediately goes "i love you a lot too"
she told me how she is so happy i am coming home for her birthday and can not wait for my aunt's to see me because she is so proud of me and want's them to see how much i have changed. i told her i hope they're proud too and she told me they better be b/c she's their mother.
she just makes me feel so good. she told me she is happier then ever i am coming home to go to school next year so she can visit me often and we can spend more time together. she also, asked if i had any plans for valentines day and i told her no..i wished. and she went on and on, surprised i didn't have lots of dates since i was so pretty and etc. i laughed....grandmas are meant to say those sort of things.
she then asked if i was seeing any boys here in chicago and i told her they are all weird and she told me city folks usually are. that when she lived in nyc and grew up, she didn't have a lot of friends.
then she continued to tell me about the times when her and her brother would ride their bikes in their swim suits in long island, as they would play on the beach. she started remembering times and it was nice to hear them.
i love hearing about my grandma's life. she is so beautiful and just so...amazing to me.
we then hung up and she told me she would tell me how her surgery went. it's just something minor. she got a little cancerous mole on her back. hell, i've had one of those.
anyways, i can not wait to go home and see my family. they are amazing to me. i am going to post some pictures in my next post.

my baby said she wanted some action
i said baby, i can't give you that
i'm a simple man
my baby said she wanted adventure
i said baby, the outside world's not safe
we should sit down
my baby said she wanted some action
i said baby, i can't give you that
i'm a simple man
my baby said she wanted adventure
i said baby, the outside world's not safe
we should sit down

i read all the time about how they fly
like children my mind is filled with playtime
but why must i go out into the cold?
my life is inside, we're safe, we can hide
i read all the time about how they fly
like children my mind is filled with playtime
but why must i go out into the cold?
my life is inside, we're safe, we can hide

my baby said she wanted some action
i said baby, i can't give you that
i'm a simple man
my baby said she wanted adventure
i said baby, the outside world's not safe
we should sit down
my baby said she wanted some action
i said baby, i can't give you that
i'm a simple man
my baby said she wanted adventure
i said baby, the outside world's not safe
we should sit down

1. What color is your bra that your wearing right now?
bright with flowers, lol

2. Do you ever lie about your age?
nah, besides i already look younger then i am

3. Do you prefer "sensitive boys" or "tough guys"?
tough, with some sensativity to understand things

4. Do you prefer blonde or brunette guys?
who cares

5. Are you currently single?
i am, for once

6. How many things in your past do you regret?
several

7. Did you answer number six truthfully?
i did

8. Do you have a best friend?
i wish, but cory is as close as it can get

9. What do you want to be when you grow up?
happy

10. Have you ever kissed someone u didn't have feelings for?
of course

11. Where do you shop to buy most of your clothes?
aa

12. Who was the last person you hugged?
probably my pops

13. Have you ever had your heart broken?
mhm

14. Have you ever thought about running away?
i have, haha

15. Have you ever wanted someone but you knew you couldn't?
i had that problem for a few good years

16. Have you ever felt like killing somebody? Who?
well..not seriously.

17. If you could change anything about your past, what would you change?
many things

18. Do you like your life?
sometimes

19. Do you shop at Hollister?
hell naw

21. Has one of your friends ever stabbed you in the back?
mmhmmm.....

22. Did you forgive them?
i got enough shit on my table, theirs aint that important

24. Do you have more friends that are girls or boys?
probably fellas

25. How long have you had MySpace?
dang...3-4 years

26. Have you ever skipped school?
too many times, i was somewhat known for it

28. Have you ever punched a girl in the face?
hah!

29. If so why?
stupidity

30. What is one of your biggest fears of your life?
not living to my potential

31. Have you ever met santa clause?
i'm a jew

32. Has anyone close to you ever passed away?
unfortunately

33. Have you ever cried yourself to sleep?
sad times

34. Have you ever not been able to get someone out of your head?
eventually, keep yourself busy

35. Do you believe in the saying "once a cheater, always a cheater"?
nah

36. Are you a player?
that's a stupid question, although many of these are

37. What kind of cell phone do you have?
white chocolate

40. Have you ever had a good feeling about something and it turned out you were right?
never

41. Do you ever wish you were famous?
sometimes, i could buy the things i liked and help out folks

1. EVER BEEN GIVEN AN ENGAGEMENT Ring? nah  

2. LONGEST RELATIONSHIP?  about 2 years
3. LAST GIFT YOU RECEIVED? my new winter coat from my pops
4. EVER DROPPED A CELL PHONE? too often
5. WHEN'S THE LAST TIME YOU WORKED OUT? couple weeks, eeep
6. THING(S) YOU SPEND A LOT OF MONEY ON? food and clothes
7 . LAST FOOD YOU ATE? mac and cheese

8. FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT THE OPPOSITE SEX? their lingo and style

9. ONE FAVORITE SONG? september, earth wind and fire
10. WHERE DO YOU LIVE? the buckeye state

11. HIGH SCHOOL YOU ATTENDED: chagrin falls high school
12. CELL PHONE SERVICE PROVIDER: verizon
13. FAVORITE MALL STORE: american apparel
14.. LONGEST JOB YOU HAD: hah
15. DO YOU OWN A PAIR OF DICE? yayuhhh, C LO!
16. DO YOU PRANK CALL PEOPLE?: nah

17. LAST WEDDING YOU ATTENDED: my pops
18. FIRST FRIEND YOU'D CALL IF YOU WON THE LOTTERY: cory probably
20. FAVORITE FAST FOOD RESTAURANT: taco bell suckaa

21. BIGGEST LIE YOU HAVE EVER HEARD: haha shit, too many
23. WHERE'S YOUR FAVORITE PLACE TO EAT WITH FRIENDS? hm. idk.

24. CAN YOU COOK? better then you

25.WHAT DO YOU DRIVE? fuggin cavalier

26. BEST KISSER: *
27. LAST TIME YOU CRIED?: last night
28. MOST DISLIKED FOODS: i dont like black olives

29. THING YOU LIKE MOST ABOUT YOURSELF: i dont really know
30. THING YOU DISLIKE MOST ABOUT YOURSELF: my ability to give a shit sometimes
32. LONGEST SHIFT YOU HAVE WORKED AT A JOB?: *shrugs*
33. FAVORITE MOVIE? there are too many
34. CAN YOU SING? yes i can
35. LAST CONCERT ATTENDED? the album leaf
36. LAST MOVIE SEEN? i dont even remember

37. LAST MOVIE RENTED: who knows

38.ONE THING YOU NEVER LEAVE THE HOUSE WITHOUT: cell phone
43. LAPTOP OR DESKTOP COMPUTER?: macbook
44. FAVORITE COMEDIAN?: gah. idk. i like robin williams, he's seksy.

46. SLEEP WITH OR WITHOUT CLOTHES? depends
47. WHO SLEEPS WITH YOU EVERY NIGHT?: harold does
48. DO LONG DISTANCE RELATIONSHIPS WORK?: sometimes, depends on the distance
49. HOW MANY TIMES HAVE YOU BEEN PULLED OVER BY THE POLICE? twice

50. PANCAKES OR FRENCH TOAST? french toast, man

51. DO YOU LIKE COFFEE?: nah

52 HOW DO YOU LIKE YOUR EGGS? scrambled with cheese

53. DO YOU BELIEVE IN ASTROLOGY?: sometimes you gotta

54. LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE?: bailey
55. LAST PERSON ON YOUR MISSED CALL LIST?: max
56. WHAT WAS THE LAST TEXT MESSAGE YOU RECIEVED?: i aint tellin

58. NUMBER OF PILLOWS?: 2

59. WHAT ARE YOU WEARING RIGHT NOW?: shorts and a fleece

60. PICK A LYRIC, ANY LYRIC: drop that phone. sleep on the floor. dream about me.

61. WHAT KIND OF JELLY DO YOU LIKE ON YOUR PB & J?:  strawberry

62. CAN YOU PLAY POOL?: nahh

63. CAN YOU SWIM? yeah, but im not very good

64. FAVORITE ICE CREAM?: mint

65. DO YOU LIKE MAPS? i get confused

66. TELL ME A RANDOM FACT ABOUT YOURSELF: i could out drink any of ya'll
68. EVER ATTEND A THEME PARTY?: yeah
69. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE SEASON? spring
70. LAST TIME YOU LAUGHED AT SOMETHING STUPID? i laughed at cory
71. WHAT TIME DID YOU WAKE UP THIS MORNING? 10:45

72. BEST THING ABOUT WINTER?: hot chocholate
73. LAST TIME A COP GAVE YOU A TICKET?: this past summer
75. NAME OF YOUR FIRST PET? lucy
76. DO YOU THINK PIRATES ARE COOL OR OVERRATED?: who cares

77. WHAT ARE YOU DOING THIS WEEKEND?? relaxing
78. BIRTHDATE ?  10-23-87
79. WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE: work in the fashion industry (marketing/journalism)  and write a novel on the side
80. WHAT COLOR IS YOUR HAIR RIGHT NOW? dark brown
81. WHAT DO YOU DO TO BE SEXY? not a damn thing
82.WHAT ANIMAL ARE YOU? panda

84.DO YOU WANT TO HAVE SEX WITH ANYONE ON YOUR TOP8/12/16? i dont have one of those
85. ARE YOU ON A LAPTOP?: yes
87. ARE YOU SMILING?: nope

89. DO YOU MISS SOMEONE RIGHT NOW? ....yeah

90. IF YOU COULD GO ANYWHERE IN THE WORLD WHERE WOULD YOU GO? i would go to ny and florida to visit some buds
92. ARE YOU IN HIGH SCHOOL? nope
93. DO YOU HAVE A CRUSH?: sure
94. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE NAME? scout? izzie? charlie? my future children's names
95. WHAT COLOR IS YOUR BATHING SUIT?: green with white polka dots
96. DOES YOUR SCHOOL START IN AUGUST?: nope, september
97. DID YOU GO ON VACATION LAST MONTH?: i went home
98. HAVE YOU EVER BEEN ON A CRUISE?: nah
99. DO YOU HAVE A SISTER ? nope
100. ARE YOU UPSTAIRS?: no, on my couch

101. ARE YOU IN LOVE?: *

102. HAVE YOU EVER BEEN IN THE HOSPITAL? inflamed lung
103. DO YOU WISH YOU COULD SEE ANYONE PARTICULAR RIGHT NOW? of course i do. i miss my friends.

104. WHAT JEWELRY ARE YOU WEARING? nothing
105. WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO AFTER THIS SURVEY? shower, perhaps go back to sleep

who did i see twice today? oh yeah. that's right.
adrian grenier. eihgiqeghqe. suchhh a babe. he smiled at me too. oh em gee. i sound silly, but i dont care.

weird.
so i went tanning today, saw bri. weird how time changes.
then i ran into my brothers ex girlfriend of 3 years and she pretty much ignored me until i waved her down and she had to say hello.
people.
and now im kinda just procrastinating the work i should do by looking at clothes, lol.
i'll get it done.
tonight i think rach, britt, bai and i may go to lakewood to see dan. but idk, i dont know if i really want to. we'll see.
i just want fabulous clothes, have all my homework done, and have my buddies teleported to chicago with me, where i'll be hanging out with him =)

i'll show you what i plan on purchasing when i get home with the money i DONT have, haha.

and

this scarf in the creme color

this cardigan

another one of these t's in red

I NEED A JOB. that is my goal when i return back to chicago.

goodness, it's hot in my room.
anyways...things have been okay since i have been home. kinda strange. i cant make time for everyone and i feel bad.
i need to start my homework and stop putting it off. or else i am really going to regret it once i get home, bloooeh.
haha, i love how i can still get caught up in random people's bull shit in ohio. god people, fuckin grow up. im over it.

well...today looks like some tanning. maybeeeeee some shopping, i need underwear and a pair of jeans. then homework. more homework and then gettin tipsy tonight.
okay i need to get up.

good day people!

my pops ordered this for me today =)

since i've been home it's been pretty good.
i came home from my flight, then went to p.f. chang's with my dad, had good conversation. then we came home and i took a nap and rachael and britt came over to wake me up and then we went and said hello to brian and alex, it was good to see them. then we went home. i went to bailey's house, saw the new house and drank some wine, caught up. then gar came over and we watched silly things on tv and made fun of one another, then i came home and passed out.

today i am going tanning, so i can clear up my skin more and then go to the dentist to get ma teef cleaned and get my 2 front teeth fixed. then i gotta do homework, bake some pies and then schmooze with my buddies and visit andrew at work!!! i miss him.

well..i should shower. and i realized i only brought home 2 pairs of pants. i didn't pack much. weird. and i forgot my leggings.
p.s. i hope im able to get some new sneakers and a down coat out of my dad while im here. HOODY HOOO.
alright, well everyone enjoy their day.

i was suppose to go job hunting today, but i figured getting my homework done would be much more important. so that is what i am doing.
also, im trying to get cleared for resitration, but it seems i wont be able to until tuesday at 3 on the 28th, oh well. better late then never.

and i am looking forward so much to seeing some buddies tomorrow, gosh. i cant wait! first things first is i am going to see bailey that night.
then i gotta make time to see cory, andrew before he leaves, rach, claire, britt, etc.
well...i feel like i cant really write at the moment, i have to much in my head and no way to really sort through it all.
im stressed with lots of work and i feel like there is tension between annye and i here, which i dont know why. but i hope it isn't serious. and
i have to start packing, but i'll wait till max is here to help me out. my flight is at noon tomorrow, i dont get in at noon. dang! i get in at 2:15.

well fuck relationships. that's what i have to say. and the fact they are never simplistic, or easy, or enjoyable. well, sometimes. but the fact im sitting here and see little miss kendall in tears and myself upset, im over it.
sick of the heart ache and the stupidity of one's words. just think before you act. the world does not revolve around you and for once think what it is like to be in someone else's shoes.

man, so much is soaring through my head, i dont even know where to begin.
im kinda sad to go home, but yet again i am excited...

andrew: fap fap
me: muaha
me: i could, well i dont have a penis
me: i would squish squish
me: GUESS WHAT
andrew: hahahhaha
me: i will be home in 2 days
andrew: damnit i leave right when you get here
me: NO YOU DONT
me:  do you leave???
andrew: got darnit
andrew: the 23rd
andrew: thursday
andrew: florida
me: the 21st
me: so you are seeing me!!!
me: okay??
andrew: call me baby
me: you know i will
me: oh i miss you! im excited
andrew: hahah i misss you dos

muahaha!

brittany: hey girl
brittany: u know im coming home right!
me: YOU ARE GONNA BE HOME
me: IEHGWIEGHWEHW
me: yes
me: duh
brittany: YSYESYEYEYEYEYS
me: man
me: im excited
me: HOODDYYY HOO
brittany: yeyeye
brittany: when u getting home
brittany:tues or wed/
me: tuesday
me: at noon
me: what about you
brittany: ME TOO!!!
brittany: my flight arrives in cleveland at 1158
me: eighweioghwoierhw
me: I AM GOING TO SEE YOU

and alex just called me!! she said she is going to come visit over a long weekend. i am syked! i miss her. i miss her a lot.
and im kinda dreading going home though...reason. too much work. 4  papers to write. /wrists.
and im gonna miss everyone here <3.
it's only a week though and it's gonna flyyyyyyy.

today looks like a longgg day.
i have to read right now. then class till 12:50. then i willl probably nap b/c i only got 4 hours of sleep last night and then maybe work out and then i have to eat sometime. go to the math center about my math homework. then probably get dinner with either liz or max. then class again at 6:30 till 9 and then who knows. hopefully back to bed. i'd like that.

dang, im so tired. im thinking i may just go back to sleep right now. but i have a horrible craving for tacos and pizza hut pizza?
idk. i smelled pizza hut pizza on my way back to my apartment from tutoring.
anyways, ya know...it's common courtesy to just be polite and open a door for someone who is in a wheel chair. right? well there is this gal in my building and she has the biggest stick up her bum. i just wanna punch her. i have opened doors for her before and she never says thank you. she just gives an obnoxious sigh like and old jewish woman who talks, using spit and gag at the same time.
anyways, i told her "you're welcome!" then we get in the elevator and she rolls in like she owns the damn thing. not positioning herself so even a 4th person could get in. she then chomps on some gum. turns her music up louder. the minute someones door opens to their floor, she immediately pushes the "close door" button, causing the door to hit the poor gals who exited. then we reach her floor, which is before mine and she moves her wheel chair back, rolling over my foot, as i pull it from under her tire and she glares down at my foot, looks up at me with a nasty glare and exits.
fug her! like i owe her the world or something. little putz. i cant stand rude people.
anyways, now that im done venting. i just looked over my homework and i've got a hefty load. blooeh. im about to start my folk tale and then do some much needed reading since i have basically 3 books to read. well not really...that was an exaggeration. but that's what it feels like.
and i have a headache the size of saturn right now. what's with that? i've been having a lot of those lately.
well..today with tutoring went well. she told me im doing damn well, im ahead of where i should be and i have a big ol re-write to do. which i am excited about, but dreading at the same time. it'll be my 3rd re-write on this sucker.
and i gotta make an apt. with a doc here to get my shots. and if i can't, then i gotta make an apt. as soon as i can back home, so then i can register. how did i not do all this before? lazy ass..well, not so much. just too busy to get some shots, i'd rather not have just b/c i hate needles.

alright, well...im going to nap i think. or get tacos. or eat the soup max had got me last night and get majority of my story done and some reading.

man, im in such a good mood, but so overwhelmed with things to do. irhg2igh2

goodness.
this feels right. this feels nice. more then nice.
it's all new. i could get use to it. i could go on and gush, but i'll contain myself, lol.

fug, i love some of the people in my life.
and the band.

okay i need sleep.

i feel like the biggest n00b.
how come when im on the spot and im asked all sorts of questions, i respond so idiotically. then think of my answers afterwards and think "why didn't i say that?"
oh well. what can i do?
today was decent. had good talks with clairebear. did a little shopping. got rained on. broke an umbrella or two.
had some laughs with tim and kendall. had good talks with max. i like how the movie was a good background noise and time limit, lol.
anyways, i am now in bed, doing last minute homework for my sex class.

hahaha chad.
chad: Sorry
me: dont be
me: i got a laugh out of it
chad: I'm sttttttttttt000pid
me: no you arent
me: you're drunk
chad: Yea huh
me: what happened tonightt?
me: why was a girl slapping you and everyone hating you?
chad: I was playing spin the bottle with some girls and shit
me: ah
chad: I know
me: hahaha
me: NERD
chad: Ahhh I hate everything
me: why?
chad: I don't know I'm just like blah
chad: I wannna hang out with to
chad: You
me: why?
me: you kept asking me to pick you up
chad: I don't know lol cause your cooooool
chad: Haha I know but itd be cool if u could
chad: God I'm lame
i'll probably delete this b/c i'll feel bad making him look silly.
well good luck to new friendships. i miss my family. i miss my buds. i dont like the city life as much as living back home. thank god cory is going back to school.
i hope tomorrow is a good day.   dinner with claire's family? possibly. and anatomy test! hoody hoo!

im in the mood to go see rise against.

anyways, today looks like it may be an odd day. very grey.
my sleeping habits have been odd. i sleep in till 11...where before i would be up at 8. idk.
claire is in town and is suppose to call me this morning...but has yet to do so. so i think i may just shower and then give her a call, asking what the deal is. i cant wait to see a bud from back home.
and i have to study for my human sexuality test that i have been neglecting, blooeh.
i dont know when im gonna make time to study for that. i suppose i just wont go out tonight? eh, i dont know.
my plan was to get tipsy tonight. but that looks like it may not happen.

i wish i had a really good friend here. that's all.